Total tosh – but funny

Fernando Alonso, McLaren Mercedes, Barcelona, 2007, 2Is Fernando Alonso going to extreme lengths to wrestle some press coverage back from Lewis Hamilton?

The News of the World on Sunday ran an ‘exclusive’ kiss-and-tell story on Alonso – or ‘Alonson’ according to the mis-spelled headline. Apparently he drives for McClaren.

Perhaps they deliberately left the typos in so they can claim the story is about someone else if it comes to court? Or maybe they’re just crap?

Enough preamble, here’s the juicy comedy quote-age:

“He undid my shirt and slipped his hands underneath my pink Topshop bra.”
“I thought, ‘Bloody hell, I’m in bed with Alonso.”
“I’ve not got a clue what he said but it sounded gorgeous.”
“One time I asked him what he thinks about when he drives. He said, ‘The next corner …but when I’m on a straight I think about you’.”

You have to laugh – at them, not with them. The joke’s on the gutter press as long as no-one takes it seriously. Given this is in the News of the World, I wouldn’t take a word of it at face value.

The full article is below – alternatively perhaps try a NASCAR-branded Mills & Boon books…

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4 comments on Total tosh – but funny

  1. I wonder if the News of the World another Fernando Alonso (F1 Racing mentioned that there was a publisher in Oxford (no relation to the WDC!) who got some steamy fan mail in their November 2005 issue)? It would not have surprised me if the News of the World “forgot” to ask the lady in question which Fernando she meant…

    In fact, as a sometime proofreader of my university’s student paper, I am tempted to send in my CV to the News of the World with all the errors in the article highlighted as evidence that my services are needed. Since proofreaders generally charge by the hour, and the News of the World is generally pretty error-strewn, I could probably make a small fortune doing that!

  2. Ah, but now we know what you read in your off duty hours, Keith… ;)

  3. …and that I’m two days behind!

  4. Heh.I tried searching for this lady on google to find out who she really was.There were only two valid results,both of them lead to this article.So it may not be just another Alonso but apparently this women doesn’t exist either(even if they have some girls photo on the front page).

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