Pastor Maldonado, Lotus, Circuit Gilles Villeneuve, 2014

Caption Competition 53: Pastor Maldonado

Caption CompetitionPosted on | Author Keith Collantine

Pastor Maldonado, Lotus, Circuit Gilles Villeneuve, 2014

Pastor Maldonado is the latest subject of our Caption Competition.

His difficult season continued in Canada, where his Lotus broke during during qualifying and again in the race.

Can you think of a caption to go with the picture? Add your suggestion in the comments below and a selection of the best will feature in the F1 Fanatic round-up later next week.

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Image © Pirelli/Hone

161 comments on “Caption Competition 53: Pastor Maldonado”

  1. Pastor Maldonardo sitting with the people he hasn’t crashed into

    1. Chris (@tophercheese21)
      14th June 2014, 12:13

      AHAHAHA
      Yes!

    2. Ha ha! Good one. I’m not even going to try after that. :)

    3. Hahaa. :)
      “When I am not crashing into competition, I crash into parties.

  2. Maldonado waiting for Grosjean to sit and watch the race after another car’s problem.

  3. *Watches car pass* “I’d hit that!”

    1. Jorn (@curbshifter)
      14th June 2014, 17:52

      lol !

  4. Not even the suspension on a camping chair was strong enough to withstand Maldonado

  5. Maldonado enjoying a relaxing drink with all his friends

    1. And another one: maldonado daydreaming about what it would be like to sit with the cool kids…

  6. Why can i not find a car that lasts long enough to crash someone! Why!

  7. Graham (@guitargraham)
    14th June 2014, 11:06

    Lotus show Maldonado which seat he’ll soon be given if he doesnt stop crashing

    1. haha! (y)

  8. “I knew i should have packed a lunch in the car, this always happens”

    1. Daniel (@collettdumbletonhall)
      14th June 2014, 13:37

      Hahaha

  9. Recent budget cuts means that Lotus are taking a new approach to seat fitting this year

  10. Gavin Moore
    14th June 2014, 11:12

    I like this new energy recovery option.

  11. I’m really thirsty, but I can’t find my mouth. :(

  12. Maldonado is unimpressed with his seat for 2015

  13. David Scott
    14th June 2014, 11:17

    “Come on Checo, you agreed that it was my week for the invisibility cloak.”

  14. Pastor wonders how long he has to sit in the naughty corner for this time round.

  15. “F1 is no picnic” laments Maldonado.

  16. Maybe if I just sit here they won’t make crash jokes out of me.

  17. ” What a disaster!! Canadian GP was exciting even though I didn’t crash into anybody.. Shame!!… “

  18. Danksa (@danieljaksa)
    14th June 2014, 11:21

    “I pay to drive and all I get from Lotus is bottled water and a chair for my friend”

  19. !To crash, or not to crash: that is the question!”

  20. Maldonado listening to his iPod, getting slightly depressed: “We are the champions, my friend..”

  21. Bernie Ecclestone is still looking for pay drivers for successfully funding his retirement, after his legal troubles. We have here a likely candidate…

  22. Oscar Jonas
    14th June 2014, 11:36

    Everyone left when Pastor crashed the party.

    1. There’s your winner

    2. best in my opinion

    3. That’s it

    4. very good ! winner

    5. That is a winner. Bingo.

  23. And who said I wouldn’t find a seat for next year………

  24. ”I better leave the old skid lid on in case I hit something”

  25. Jamie Brothwell
    14th June 2014, 11:40

    Once again Maldonado picks the wrong seat

  26. I knew #*blub*# it wasn’t #*glog*# possible #*cough*# to drink #*gag*# this with #*blub*# my helmet on! #*cough*#

  27. When Maldonado said he was going to crash the party the rest of the team got the wrong message.

    1. hahaha, this is the best one so far!

  28. Maldonado overcooked the Pastor at camp

  29. Pastor was unimpressed when he saw the only seat that PDVSA would buy for him next season.

  30. Pastor realises F1 is just not the picnic he thought it would be.

  31. Maldonado, “I wish I was the Stig! Took away my job!”

  32. But why the helmet? is he crying?!

  33. Chris (@tophercheese21)
    14th June 2014, 12:15

    “Sitting on this park bench has been the best decision in my career so far.” – Pastor Maldonado

  34. Pastor demonstrates the safest ‘Lotus Position’ for everyone.

  35. Maldonaldo finally begins to suspect a prank when he is the only one to show up for the company picnic.

  36. Pastor’s metaphor requesting the team build a comparatively tough car for 2015 went over everyones heads.

  37. Zzzzzzzz……………

  38. Enzzzzzzzzzztone

  39. “I hope the Stig is not toying with my car…well, not as much as me… :|”
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HD5vDs0RBY

  40. Maldonado waits at Turn 4 to cast his curse on the Caterhams and Marussias…

  41. “Could we please just install four wheels onto this bench…?”

  42. That comfy Williams seat is still not as good as my Lotus bench.

  43. You know things are not good when Pastor needs a helmet just to go on a picnic.

  44. It’s 14:07 and I’m out. What am I going to do for 90 minutes?

  45. Judging by their hospitality area and it’s occupant, it is obvious…Lotus is broke.

  46. The last Pastor heard from the marshals were “Just stay there with your helmet on, we’ll take care of everything!”

  47. Since this is Canada, the hockey analogy for Pastor’s early demise would be “riding the pine.”

  48. Pastor tried to sit in the folding chair, but missed.

  49. Seat fitting for next year they said…

  50. I know for Kimi would not sit on a £5 chair. I have asked for a golden framed chair! …

  51. “Oh come on, Stig told me he would only borrow the car for a couple of minutes…”

  52. “again?”

  53. 3 seconds after this picture was taken, the wooden table crashed into the garden chair.

  54. Out of frustration, Pastor Maldonado considers a nearby John Deere riding mower as a tempting alternative to his Lotus. It would be faster amd would improve the sound of F1, and…he could continue to create his own racing lines off the track and still maintain traction. No brainer.

    1. NomadIndian
      16th June 2014, 11:42

      Haha… why did I find this so funny…

  55. What can I crash into next… The chair? The table? The trees? Whatever it is PDVSA will pay for it!!!

  56. I think I’ll just crash here for now.

    1. Excellent

  57. Pastor hates it when his stunt double is driving the car.

  58. Sigh…I’ve even broken the pull tab. :-(

    1. Haha, nice.

  59. “Every year, dogs are abandoned on road…”

  60. KeepTurningLeft
    14th June 2014, 14:36

    “This is the most anyone has ever paid to watch the race from a picnic table.”

  61. I hope I get at least this seat next season.

  62. Maldonado talks with his advisers.

  63. “I wonder, whether this chair could withstand a crash.”

  64. Maldonado tests latest ‘out of the box’ E22 components as budget shortfalls force Lotus to downsize facilities.

  65. I crashed this party, and everyone went home straight away.

  66. Maldonado is depressed when the engineer could not include that chair inside of his car

  67. I am the Stig

  68. Why won’t anyone come to my picnic?…oh yeah…they’re all racing….

  69. Pastor goes for a different box this lap

    1. Nice observation

  70. Pastor’s advertising the new Lotus recycled range. Featuring furniture made from Pastors crashed cars and at the end of this year, Pastor himself!

  71. I wonder when the guys are going to fix my car.

  72. Charles Picnic.

  73. “I’m sure this box had my car upgrades”.

  74. I have saved this comfy chair for Massa, just in case

  75. Dave Graham
    14th June 2014, 18:20

    “The suspension on that camping chair looks a bit weak…….better sit on this bench instead

  76. After government funding is withdrawn, Maldonado takes a moment to get used to his new team’s digs.

  77. Lotus issue new denial of budget shortfall.

  78. Due to his record of crashing at any given moment, Maldonado was advised to keep his safety gear on permanently

    1. I just put something similar! I didn’t notice your comment! :)

  79. Life hasn’t always been a picnic for Pastor since moving to Lotus, but today, for once, it has..

  80. Mikeybgaming
    14th June 2014, 18:42

    Pastor Maldonado is now required to wear his race suit, helmet and Hans device at all times for the safty of himself and the spectators

  81. Raúl Valencia
    14th June 2014, 18:59

    The last gathering of Pastor Maldonado’s fan club.

  82. Pastor tests the bench ….. for 2015 .

  83. Pastor’s damage bill has forced Lotus to seriously downgrade their motorhome

  84. “I wish my seat was as secure as that one.”

  85. Chris White
    14th June 2014, 19:30

    Pastor suddenly realised it wasn’t a bottle of water Kimi had given him.

  86. Following another disappointing weekend, a dedicated Maldonardo fan really was beginning to feel a bit silly.

  87. delongedoug
    14th June 2014, 20:18

    You can’t sit here! I paid for these seats, too!

  88. Which seat is the safest

  89. “So, how do I start the letter…let me think… Dear Frank, I know we’ve been through some tough times in the past, but I really miss all of you guys in Grove…”

  90. “Bottled Water”, I could sell bottled water! GET YOUR Pastor Signature bottled water here for just $13

  91. Pastor always brings a camping chair with him in anticipation of his teammate coming to join.

  92. While crying: Boowwaa whyy did I left Williams ….WHY!?!?!

  93. Maldonado came rushing to the benches, everyone fled to avoid the wreckage.

  94. Pastor Maldonado recovers from his latest shunt, caused by a front suspension failure in his Lotus camping chair.

  95. Take some gardening leave, they said.

    1. hahaha.. nice

  96. johnny stick
    15th June 2014, 2:59

    I think i need to get me a red bull

  97. Pastor Maldonardo blames performance on seat fitting.

  98. missing glove syndrome; only, if I found my other glove , I would have been able to crash into something .

  99. Trying to find a alternative podium.

  100. Maldonando takes a day off to calculate the money spent on car damages

  101. Pastor Maldonado thinking: “Last minute check. Steering wheel, check. Throttle, check. Helmet, check…. Mommy, no need for fake trophies anymore ´cause I´m going to win that Montrealian vase! Now, where is my second water bottle?

  102. Time to teach massa and Perez how to flip the car at high speeds. Fellow s.Americans ain’t bad good work boys

  103. why can’t I be normal like all the rest of them

  104. What if I went to the WEC’s GTE AM series?

  105. Lotus crash test dummie

  106. Isn’t it amazing that almost all comments here are about Supidaldo’s crashes. :)

    Here is mine.

    “Pastor finally does some thinking”

  107. “Everyyyyybody hurrrrts… sometimes”

  108. When I signed up to Lotus, I thought they could at least afford some brakes on their cars !!!!

  109. “Of the picnic places of all F1 circuits, this one is the best. Believe me, I have a lot of experience of them.”

  110. Attention Please, The FIA is pleased to introduce the new 2015 F1 chassis crash tests driver.

  111. A disgruntled Maldonado, told the team the car drives like a park bench, so they gave him one and said, ok, drive that, smartass.

  112. Pastor’s bi-polar medication wasnt getting the job done.

  113. “It should have been ME ploughing the Williams into the back of Perez” :(

  114. J. K., Pn, Finland
    16th June 2014, 0:21

    No coke, no pepsi, oh my!

  115. After recent failures Lotus go back to “bench testing” mode

  116. Pastor tries to beat “bench mark time” set by Romain

  117. They told me to pack my stuff. But I’ve already crashed everything…

  118. so this is the new racing seat?

    -it looks comfy!

  119. catered Ham
    16th June 2014, 12:11

    in talks with his future team boss…

  120. His Agent: “Pastor, we hear there is an empty seat for 2015 season you should go for….”

  121. “When dad said he’d buy me a race seat, I expected one inside a car!”

  122. “Who am I ?!”

  123. Maldonado becomes the first drive to try out the noty room in 2014

  124. After all things which ahppened to me this year, now I understand why F1 dint have no. “13” on the grid all these years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!……. Y did I take it???? :(.

  125. I ll ask Bernie to change my no. from 13!!!!.. :P

  126. Pastor getting his seat fitting for 2015.

  127. “I’m not taking my helmet off because i do not want to speak to the press.”

  128. Glyn Blackburn
    17th June 2014, 17:14

    Health and safety at these after race picnics has really gone too far!

  129. feeling lonely after the crash, Pastor says, ” f1 is boring these days”

  130. Pastor had to admit that Williams had the edge when it came to team hospitality!

  131. Another bad day at the office for Pastor M.

  132. There is always a picnic table reserved for Pastor Maldonado in every race venue.

  133. Well look at here. It’s the 1972 Miami Dolphins trying to ruin Mercedes. OH… a text!!!!

    OH NO!!! PLEASE HAAS!!!! DON’T HIRE DANICA!!!!!

  134. Spare seat at Lotus ….Pastor’s on Gardening Leave !

  135. Don’t you know F1 buddies I have a CRUSH on you, and my country pays for that.

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