Caption Competition 74: Ecclestone and Hamilton

Caption Competition

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Bernie Ecclestone and Lewis Hamilton walk and talk in the Bahrain Grand Prix paddock.

What’s being said? That’s for you to decide in our latest Caption Competition.

Make your suggestions in the comments and a selection of the best will appear in a future edition of the F1 Fanatic Round-up.

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Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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134 comments on “Caption Competition 74: Ecclestone and Hamilton”

  1. I managed to find the sunglasses, now where can I get those chains?

    1. Very good. Won it at the first corner.

  2. Bernie: All these problems, I wish I could talk to someone about it… Lewis: I could hook you up with a Twitter account if you want?..

    1. @me4me

      #blessed

  3. Hamilton: So Bernie, you sorted out the unlimited power for me and the restricted power for the others right! Bernie: Yup!

    1. Hamilton: please restrict tire chamber for Kimi, restrict radio assist for Rosberg, restrict engine development for Alonso, and last but not least..restrict Vettel to shout yoo-hoo!

  4. “The good, the bad and the ugly”

  5. Bernie: Can you fix me up with one of those gold chains?
    Lewis: I’ll be #blessed.

  6. “I told Sebastian ‘you should be doing what he’s doing’”

  7. Lewis: I’ll have the championship, you can have Nicole

  8. They’ve told that I’m running this like Kim Jong Un…
    I know what you feel… they told that I dress like Dennis Rodman.

  9. 2nd button from the bottom on bernies shirt :
    i need more money bernie, these other buttons aren’t pulling their weight

    1. Lewis: “So when’s it due?”

  10. Lewis: “C’mon Bernie, reveal your secret about women.”

  11. But if I let a Ferrari get that close, they might pass Nico!

  12. Lewis: So Bernie, that thing that happened in Malaysia won’t happen again, right?
    Bernie: Of course man, no problem…

  13. Bernie: “Lewis did I ever tell you about the time I paid off the German government to get away with bribery”

  14. Lewis began to suspect that the Assisting the Elderly badge Nico had mentioned wasn’t a real thing at all, and the ‘nice old man’ was in fact completely insane.

    1. +1. You got my vote!

    2. Lewis and an elderly fan..

  15. Now Lewis, you have to agree; calling the track Bernie’s Rein has much more zing to it than simply Bahrain; wouldn’t you agree?

  16. Bernie: “If I weren’t wearing a belt, my belly would literally explode!”

  17. Lewis Hamilton heads F1’s new ‘Care in the Community’ program.

  18. So Lewis, the german GP is history as we agreed. Now give me that chain.

  19. Lewis, that bloke behind me has been following me all day.. Can you pretend to be my mate?

  20. AMR (@aiera-music)
    25th April 2015, 13:03

    Lewis Hamilton celebrates his recent successes with an elderly F1 fan.

  21. Daniel (@mechanicalgrip22)
    25th April 2015, 13:08

    Taking time out of his intensive training schedule, our world champion is seen here helping a senile old man find his way home.

  22. Lewis: “Hey Bernie, can you see what you can do to get me into Ferrari?”

  23. “Please can I stop wearing all this ‘bling’ now, Bernie?”

  24. “Hamilton helps elderly fan cross paddock”

  25. “It’s ok Bernie. The toilet is this way, you’ll make it on time.”

  26. Lewis tries desperately to convince Bernie that clown shoes and sprinklers are not going to improve the show.

  27. Peppermint-Lemon (@)
    25th April 2015, 14:12

    How much will you pay for my gold jewellery, Bernie?

    You look ridiculous Lewis I’ll pay you to not wear it

  28. “Okay Lewis. Pippa Middleton next alright? Or Gina Maria Schumacher I don’t mind. Plus a speeding ticket and a rumour about you being gay. Just a rumour, trust me. My word is my bond. Then five championships, honest to God. Okay okay six then. Who dares wins my son.”

  29. Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker.

  30. OmarR-Pepper - Vettel 40 victories!!! (@)
    25th April 2015, 14:18

    “My daughters have many of those necklaces and earrings too”.

  31. Old school rap legend Bernie Bling Bling and MC Ham get together to lay down some tracks for Ham’s new album “Eat Dust” art Bernie’s studio “Greed Creed”.

    1. Old school rap legend Bernie Bling Bling and MC Ham get together to lay down some tracks for Ham’s new album “Eat Dust” at Bernie’s studio “Greed Creed”.

  32. Bernie:

    “That transponder you’re holding in your left hand will tell you how Ferrari’s pace is relative to Nico, so you can help the poor lad out should he get challenged………”

  33. Once again Lewis is holding somebody up, this time from Bernie getting to the bank.

  34. Lotus-Grosjean
    25th April 2015, 14:48

    Bernie, you have to walk faster! My teammate is having tyre trouble and complaining that I’m backing him into the guys behind!

  35. “Well Lewis, after your sex change surgery you will be the first champion in the new Female-F1 series… by the way: good idea wearing all those chains and earrings, first step in the right direction!”

  36. tweedle dee and tweedle dum

  37. Chris (@tophercheese21)
    25th April 2015, 15:05

    #F1DoesntNeedSocialMediaOrKids #TeamBE #BestFansWhatFans #Blessed #Rich

  38. Lewis, you know how attracted I am to women I wouldn’t necessarily beat in a pub fight, how would Nicole feel if I gave her a ring?

    1. +1
      So true!

  39. Bernie indoctrinate his disciple on how to getting most out of deliberately delay contract.

  40. Bernie: I know they’re both a bit “Spoilt”, but if you could marry one of my daughters so she’d spend your money instead of mine, I’d be much obliged.
    Lewis: thanks Bernie, but they’re both as insane as you are. I’ll pass.

  41. Don’t worry, we’ll find your teeth..

  42. So Bernie, could you tell your daughters I’m free and available now?

  43. Ecclestone: You don’t need guidance, Lewis. In time, you will learn to trust your feelings. Then, you will be invincible. I have said it many times, you are the most gifted driver I have ever met.
    Hamilton: Thank you, Your Excellency.
    Ecclestone: I see you becoming the greatest of all the drivers, Lewis. Even more powerful than Master Schumacher.

    1. @winnieracer: Very good. I laughed like a Wookie.

    2. This was very good. How good? Goooooooooooood!

  44. Count Hamilton: The force is with us, Master Ecclestone.
    Darth Ecclestone: Welcome home Lord Hamilton. You have done well.
    Count Hamilton: I have good news for you, my lord. War has begun.
    Darth Ecclestone: Excellent. Everything is going as planned. Once more, the Sith will rule the galaxy! And… we shall have peace.

  45. Bernie: So how does one ‘go HAM’ exactly?

    1. Good good

  46. Lewis: Don’t worry Bernie i’ll have enough to buy this whole thing soon.

  47. I’m kinda lonely without Nicole… Hey Bernie, can I be your Howard?

  48. So am I gonna win the title or not Bernie?

  49. Lewis Hamilton helps an elderly man who is lost and confused.

    1. Good one. That made me lol!

  50. Interracial couples face many challenges in society.

  51. i have a Calvin Klein photo shoot later, can i borrow your sock?

  52. B: ‘Yo yo , what up? I’m B to the E, Mr for-mu-la 1 that’s ME!’
    L: ‘er… ‘

  53. Lewis – “Honestly Bernie, its a really annoying squeaky dog toy, its ruining everything! I wish it would just go away”
    Bernie – “Lewis, a lot of people say the same about me”

  54. Lewis “I got 99 problems but the rich ain’t one”

  55. Now, Lewis, those songs you make ought to be accessable. DO NOT DARE to venture out of 4/4 rapping no matter what offer from Yes you’re getting.

    Come on Lewis, for the show!

  56. I know Bernie. It’s okay. I understand nobody will listen to your idea of a return to V8 engines, but I will.

  57. Lewis: Right now nobody is out there to challenge either of us!
    Bernie: Yeah there is nobody! (thinks inside: Uh no. I am slightly p*$$*d by these Manor guys!!)

  58. “F1 star does community service in a retirement home.”

  59. Lewis: “Uncle Bernie, let’s talk about that place I told you the other day. You have to trust me, it’s awesome, there’s all people like you, you get to play cards all day and there’s a nurse who gives you nice pills that make you feel happy.”
    Bernie: “but.. I’m still powerful, look, I have a my gun ‘phew phew bang bang!’ ”
    Lewis: “…”

  60. Don’t worry old fella, we’ll soon get you back to the home

  61. Lewis: After Fangio won his 2nd title what did he ask you for Bernie as I want the same!
    Bernie: He, like you, wanted Ferrari but that didn’t come until title number 4 lewis so your 3rd title with Merc is still on plan, just make sure you get that pre-contract approval from Ferrari for 2017.

  62. I hate to ask this Lewis, but could you float me $20 until the weekend?

  63. Bernie: The force is strong in you my young palpatine.
    LH: Yes master but are you sure we are not on the dark side?
    Bernie: offcourse my apprentice

  64. B: You can get much farther with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
    L: (I knew he is crazy, but …)

  65. Don’t worry bernie, F1 will last longer than you.

  66. Lewis consoles stereotypical old man complaining about noise, not having enough money and bad Manors.

  67. “So Bernie, how about you give me ownership of F1 from CVC and I’ll give you this gold necklace”

  68. ‘If you retire this year I will see you alright with a used car lot in Essex’.

  69. LH: “This way grandpa, come’on”
    BE: “Where are we going young man?”
    LH: “The nursing home. After threatening to drop Monza for Baku you’ve clearly forgotten this sports history”.

  70. LH: Good work on destabilising Renault and Red Bull, grandpa.
    BE: Can I rest now? That nursing home you promised…
    LH: Not yet you old fool. I need to slow Ferrari down next. Get them working on something crazy… maybe send them back to V8 research. Something seductive but pointless.
    BE: Oh, all right. You’ve always been my favourite grandson.
    LH: You’ve fallen out with Sebastian then? You should write him out of your will.
    BE: I’m not a bad man am I? Who are all these people?

  71. Martin Gardiner
    25th April 2015, 21:41

    Come this way old fella, don’t worry we will ask security to find your wallet. Now what’s your name again

  72. BE: “Don’t worry Sebastien, Paul’s coming up with tires just for you. You’ve got to rein in those Mercs before Lewis runs away with it.”

  73. Do you really think I’m a better champion than Vettel?

  74. Lewis: “It’s like walking with Roscoe”

  75. Look on the bright side Lewis, it beats the hell out of being poor and unhappy.

  76. Hannibal and B.A. looking for a Face and a Murdoch to round out the A-team

    1. Hannibal and B.A. love it when a plan comes together

  77. “So you are telling me I can get a better contract at Ferrari? Want to be my manager Bern?”

  78. – So you see Lewis, it’s a serious problem, I’m asking leading scientists, civil engineers and all bright minds to tackle this. I will spare no costs.
    – To make the cars go WROOOOM instead of wroom?

  79. ColdFly F1 (@)
    26th April 2015, 0:19

    Only if you get Toto to say something nice about me, then I’ll make sure you get more TV coverage.

  80. Lewis:Listen old man, don’t you think it’s time you retired?

  81. Be careful son……I’m sure he’s got one……..he just has to go like this & pull the trigger.

  82. “So Lewis …. how’s single life treating you? You want my daughters’ phone numbers?”

  83. Bernie: Now you promise me that nico will be in a straight jacket by seasons’ end right?
    Lewis: Don’t worry, I got it under control. See what happened after the Chinese Gp? He’ll be a wreck after Monaco…

  84. Neil (@neilosjames)
    26th April 2015, 5:18

    “Yes… married… to Geri Halliwell… I’m so sorry, he should have told you sooner.”

  85. “I had to hustle, my back to the wall, ashy knuckles. Pockets filled with a lot of lint, not a cent. Gotta vent, lot of innocent of lives lost on the project bench.”

  86. Lewis: “Don’t worry, mate. I’ll give you back the FOM TV remote control – just as soon as you start getting me more more screen time. I’m you’re #1, right? “

  87. Lewis: You’re short enough to fit in the car, Bernie, but the seat belts won’t be long enough.

  88. “Bernie, do you know that you’re taller than Arnie?”

  89. Lewis: I wonder when he’ll realise I’m not Sebastian.

  90. Bernie seen in public for the first time with his new wife…

  91. Lewis, I know I lend you a quid last week, don’t make any excuses about not having signed yet. I want it back. If I show up at a bank they sue me right away.

  92. Lewis’ old man

    1. Or:

      Lewis takes his old man for a walk

  93. Lewis snatches the water bottle out of a slow and unsuspecting Bernie’s hand.

  94. Bernie: hold me Lewis so I won’t fall down. If I fall down you won’t be able to win any more.

  95. Lewis consoles Bernie after Manor qualify within 107% again.

  96. So you see Lewis, I’m more than 107 % older than you, but nobody can disqualify me.

  97. You see Lewis, I make more money than Calvin Klein – put together.

  98. Bernie: So I said I’d replace italy with Kazakhstan

    Lewis: oooohhkaaay… Come on old fella, its this way back to the home, time for your meds.

  99. Never mind Bernie, there’s always Tinder.

  100. “Weekend at Bernie’s 3: Bahrain goes bonkers!” Starring Lewis Hamilton.

  101. Lewis: I told not to have a drinking contest with Kimi.

  102. Alan Nothard
    27th April 2015, 8:26

    Hey Bernie I’ve got a gift for you its my first ever mobile phone and the good news is it doesn’t have Facebook or Twitter !

  103. HAM: God! I’ve missed Roscoe …

  104. Yeah sure, I remember your old Brabham team. And now you suggest you and me start team BernHAM? Mmmm, let me get back to you on that.

  105. Bernie: “You gotta strike when the moment is right without thinking” – one for Floyd fans!

  106. Thanks for stitching up McLaren with those Honda engines….

  107. Bernie: Lewis, I’ll say happy in Red… you say happy in grey… people talk… and, we make money. How does that sound?

  108. Ok, ok I’ll talk to Toto about making your Merc look more gansta, if you stop bugging me, okay?

    1. edit: gangsta

  109. Lewis to Bernie ” Mercedes have offered me a new tricycle, a bag of marbles and a everlasting gobstopper, what to you think I should do? “.

  110. Now listen Bernie, i all ready gave you splended advise on clothing but still you come with that to small shirt. What is happening in your head old boy?….

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