Bernie Ecclestone, Bahrain International Circuit, 2016

Caption Competition 121: Ecclestone’s exit

Caption CompetitionPosted on | Author Keith Collantine

Has Bernie Ecclestone finally headed off into the sunset? Even days after his departure was announced he was rejecting claims he is poised to set up a rival championship to Formula One.

But it seems the curtain has finally come down on his decades-long tenure at the sharp end of Formula One. So what better way to say farewell than one final Caption Competition?

Can you come up with the best caption for this picture? Post your funniest suggestion in the comments below.

A selection of the best will feature in a future edition of the F1 Fanatic Round-up.

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  • 136 comments on “Caption Competition 121: Ecclestone’s exit”

    1. “So you want me to come back out of retirement?!”

    2. What do you mean, my card’s been declined?

    3. “Activate Formula 1 Self-Destruct. Code Bravo Echo Romeo November India Echo”

    4. ‘Is that Uber?’

    5. Shane Ocallaghan
      28th January 2017, 12:01

      Errrr is that the DWP ? I would like my pension now :-)

    6. “Hey, Ron! It’s time! You, me, Flavio, Pastor and all the other F1 misfits. Show time!”

    7. “The time has come, execute Order 66.”

      1. Dammit, beat me to it…

      2. Chris (@tophercheese21)
        29th January 2017, 6:34

        +1
        This and nothing else.

      3. +10000000000000

      4. F Truth (@offdutyrockstar)
        30th January 2017, 10:48

        Winner.

    8. I can’t believe it, I lost.

    9. “Hello Bernie, its Donald Trump,”I have a job, I hear you are good at getting things done and others to foot the bill…have you ever been to Mexico?

    10. Hello from the other side
      I must have called a thousand times
      To tell you I’m sorry for everything that I’ve done
      But when I call you never seem to be home

    11. “Get me Flavio, Luca and Ron. Tell them it’s time for GPWC.”

    12. “Hello Chase? Bernie here! Thanks for giving me this iPhone, but what the heck are these things called Twitter and Facebook?”

    13. “Hello, Toto? Are you sure you definitely want Bottas this year?”

    14. Honey can you call me Taxi,they wouldn’t even drive me to the hotel.

    15. “Yeah, I’m trying to get Chase Carey on the line … the security guy at the paddock gate won’t let me in.”

    16. “Hello mr. Ecclestone? It’s the eighties calling, we want our threat with a breakaway series back…”

    17. Selling?
      Am I interested?
      Manor?
      What, like an Edwardian Country Manor?

      1. He’ll take two!!

    18. “Donald…. hey Donald…. If you’ve still got a cabinet position opened, my calendar is clear.”

    19. “Funny, isn’t it… I own this mobile telephony device and they still thought I wasn’t modern enough!”

    20. Bernie: Flavio my old friend, what does etermis mean?
      Flavio: it a fancy way of saying you are really old.
      Bernie: oh, and chairmen etermis would mean a really old chairman? So I’m still in control?
      Flavio: no bernie, it means nothing, the only thing you are in control of now is your bladder.
      Bernie:but I’m 87 I haven’t had bladder control since before max was born.
      Flavio: too much information!

    21. “Buy Liberty Media you say?”

      1. I like this one!

    22. “Hello Bernie, its Donald Trump, I hear you’re good at getting things done in other countries and to get them to foot the bill, have you ever been to Mexico?”

    23. Donald Trump accidentally ends up calling Bernie Ecclestone when trying to ring Sanders.

    24. “Hey Paul. What did you do wrong? I am suddenly losing all my grip over F1.”

    25. Hello, Mr. Marchionne. Would you like to race in my new prestigious VIP oriented series with a guaranteed seizable historic payment and veto rights for Ferrari?

    26. Satan, I thought we had a deal?!

      1. Bernie is calling Satan but for some reason Satans phone is always busy when Bernie calls.

    27. Bernie knew he’d lost, so he decided to get a smartphone to convince fans he’s still fit for the sport in these times

    28. “Hi Fabiana, it’s me. Bernie! So, have you heard the news? Fabiana? Fabiana?

    29. Charlie, I left my legacy of mess in F1, over to you now… I am pretty sure you’ve got some hair brained antics to hold it back.

    30. “It’s me, call Breatori and Mosley………I’ve got an idea……!”

    31. ‘OK Google’, remove all references of Formula 1 from your search engine… That should slow Liberty’s plans to foil me!

    32. 1970 is calling and it wants it’s Bernie back.

    33. “I don’t like being alone, so I managed to take Manor with me. Who says I still don’t have it?”

    34. What do you mean by ‘Resume’?

    35. Nick (@theawesomefish)
      28th January 2017, 14:31

      “Hello, Mr. Hamilton? Have you been involved in an accident that wasn’t your fault?”

    36. Bernie – “Some American with a funny moustache fell for it….”

    37. Hello darling, they want me to be a Honorary Ambassador for F1 now, could you google on honorary for me? I have no idea what it means.

    38. Hi, Satan. Yeah its about selling you the rights to my soul. I’m afraid you’ve been outbid…

      1. Brilliant, this should win. …..

    39. I’m so lonely
      So lonely
      So lonely
      So lonely and scared and alone…

      1. ah! yes!

        I work very hard and make up great plans
        But nobody listens, no one understands
        Seems that no one takes me seriously

    40. Ouch…right in the eye…I guess that’s why it’s called an eye phone.

    41. BE: Hello Siri…where’s the nearest exit to me?
      Siri: I don’t understand your question…YOU are the nearest BExit.

    42. …yes, Mr. France. I’m quite confident that I can bring your top-tier NASCAR series back to motorsport prominence.

    43. Stop calling me! Where are your Manor’s?

    44. “Now don’t be obvious, but get the car ready at the exit. I want to get as far away as possible before they realize what a lemon I just sold them.”

    45. Alex McFarlane
      28th January 2017, 15:46

      Does the Drag Reduction System ease the drag of being dethroned?

    46. What…yeah…Casey just used DRS to pass me up…ban it!

      (sorry for repost, autocorrect got me lol)

    47. Derek Edwards
      28th January 2017, 15:55

      “Sorry – The number you have dialed has not been recognised. Please try again.”

    48. BE: “You want F1 Management? You must have dialed the wrong number…” (grinds teeth)

    49. You are the weakest link; goodbye

    50. BE: I have a complaint about the cleaning of our offices … Yes, it is too good … yes, we want people who can do the job badly … yes, you know, leave muddy footprints on the carpet and used coffee cups in the kitchen areas, and occasionally use some sort of solvent when polishing the desks.

    51. Hello, Inland Revenue? I’ve heard some awful things about a company’s tax arrangements… yes, it’s terrible, isn’t it… would you like all the details?

    52. BE: Hello, Marks and Spensors … I’ve just been fired and have to hand in my company shirt. Can you courier out a new one? … They said they would pay for a new one. Oh, nothing expensive, Louis Vuitton would be fine.

    53. BE: Is that British Telecom? Yes … I’m having trouble with my mobile phone … Oh … What is a “top up”?

    54. Ill be Back!

    55. “Get the petrol, we’ve got some trashing to do”

    56. “Hello Angels, I have a mission for you.”

    57. Roth Man (@rdotquestionmark)
      28th January 2017, 17:33

      “Hey Bernie it’s Ross, I just want you to know that our relationship goes a long way back and this isn’t personal…. just business.”

      1. Roth Man (@rdotquestionmark)
        28th January 2017, 17:33

        (That only makes sense if you’ve read Brawn’s book)

        1. This! Absolutely this, I was worried that no one would post it!

    58. “No I didn’t call for a taxi”

    59. Ron, I’ve just seen Becks. Do you want me to save you a seat?

    60. Bernie: how much! Really? I didn’t know I had that much in my account. Well, hasn’t F1 been good to me. I’m really proud of myself!

    61. What? oh come on man! Let me at least keep this shirt!

    62. Bernie: What do you mean the divorce papers have been filed!!!!

    63. Kill them. Kill them all.

    64. Chase: “Hey Bernie, it’s Chase. Just calling to finalise terms of the Paul Ricard deal.”
      Bernie: “I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you…”

      1. Chase: Good luck

    65. “Please hold while we get someone from Formula E to answer your financial enquiry.”

    66. “Her majesties revenue and what”?

    67. Jean, it’s me Bernie . . . whadda y’mean ‘Bernie who?’

    68. BE: Hello NASCAR … It’s Bernie Ecclestone, I’ve taken F1 as far as I could, but they’re just too far behind the times. I have big plans that could make NASCAR drivers names more well known around the world than Elvis’ … what’s the laughter for? … Oh, they’ve hung up.

    69. “Beam me up, Scottie”

    70. “Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ve got them by the short and curlies, they just don’t know it yet”.

    71. Andre Furtado
      28th January 2017, 20:49

      “Can you really track everything I say and do? You know which country I’m from right? ” speaking to the NSA after trump took over.

    72. knoxploration
      28th January 2017, 20:56

      The face of failure.

    73. So this Formula E thingy, the E is for Eccelstone right?

    74. Bernie: Paris please.
      Pilot: Certainly sir.
      Bernie: Rue de la Concorde to be precise.
      Pilot: Done.

    75. “Yes that’s right, I need to cancel the sprinklers and medals I ordered… “

    76. London man frustrated at latest irrelevant automated phone call.

      “Have you been mis-sold a qualifying format in the last two years? To speak to an advisor, do nothing for the next minute and a half.”

    77. “Mr. Carey, I’m afraid the deflector shield will be quite operational when your friends arrive…”

    78. Vladimir! Old Buddy! Look, I’m gonna need a solid. Can I borrow one of your special forces divisions? You know, the guys that “didn’t” invade Crimea? Yeah, they kicked me out. But we know how to deal with that, right?

    79. Yes of course I know what it is Jean, … LIBERTÉ, ÉGALITÉ, FRATERNITÉ.

      I got you the first one, …in fact I’m looking at that twisted moustache right now …
      But you’ve got to be joking about the next two, I don’t even know where to start, we haven’t had any of that around here for as long as I can remember. There are too many Italians at Ferrari and too many Brits at Mercedes, it’ll never fly – besides, I just lost my life-time supply of RedBull.

      Anyway, Brawn rang me… it sounds like you’re screwed too.

    80. Chase has fallen for it, Ross. He thinks I don’t know what honorary position means. Now, about my idea on weaning F1 away from artificial aids such as DRS…

    81. Hi Ross. What do you know about gardening?

    82. Bernie! Bernie, my hair-dryer ruined the picture! I need another one or I can’t get back into the forbidden city!

      Bernie: Who is this?

    83. Max, get me Adolf on the line, I need a man that can help me get some things done…

    84. Hello, taxi?

    85. Really, Toto? These guys think they’re rid of me just like that? Hahahahaha!

    86. It’s done!
      No, they suspect nothing.
      Yes, I understand.

      (To be continued)

    87. Looks like Bernie will now have the time to spend with his wife.

    88. Bernie is calling Nico asking him on how to grow a beard.

    89. You’ve called Randstad the global leader in executive recruitment; if you are currently seeking work please press 1 …

    90. “Hey Flavio, it’s Bernie. You up for some Bocce Ball later?”

    91. EU- Bernie, Sauber and Force India hearing starts next month.
      BERNIE- Sorry wrong number.

    92. “I don’t usually do this kind of thing, but I found your number in a phone box and… Max? Is that you?”

    93. And they thought i did not know social media.. i am tweeting to you, am i not?

    94. “That’s a limit order at $25 per share for 500 million shares of L-M-C-A”

    95. Is this the Cleveland Browns? This is Bernie E. I am very interested into buying your team. I will guarantee that you will win the next Super Bowl. If you can relocate to London… UH!!!! HELLO? HELLO?

    96. “Hello, this is the Job Centre. How can we help you?”
      “Hi, my name’s Bernie Ecclestone…”

    97. “Houston, F1 is your problem now”

    98. E.T. phone home

      1. Maybe better:

        Bernie phone home

    99. After finally getting a mobile phone the first call Bernie receives isn’t good news…

    100. Bernie receives a call from Ron Dennis regarding his ousting from F1…

      “Hahahahahahaha!!”

    101. Hello Vlad, it’s me, Bernie. I’m not busy tonight and thought maybe we could hang out… Hello? Hello?

    102. Yes, I’m trying to reach Theresa May regarding Bernexit…

    103. Operator, can you connect me with somebody who gives a damn about me being gone from Formula 1?

    104. Hello…Flavio, The Bernster here. Remember that idea we had after Singapore a few years back….Yes, Demolition Grand Prix. I’m freed up to work on that with you now.

    105. WeatherManNX01
      29th January 2017, 20:02

      “Well, I guess it’s back to my old job at Brabham. Wait…where did they go?”

    106. The Blade Runner (@)
      29th January 2017, 20:25

      “So, I’m worth over $4 billion, my wife is almost 40 years younger than me and I could set up a rival series whenever I wanted… but apparently I ‘lost’.”

    107. BE: Hello Sky Sports … I’ve just lost my job, I love watching F1 races, the sound, the commentary, the drivers talking to the pitwall, the onboard cameras … I just love it all. Yes … that sounds a great deal… but I don’t want to pay that much. Is there a way to watch the F1 races this year for free? …so the only way is to get the permission of Bernie Ecclestone … yeah, I know the guy … thanks… yeah … I’ll have a chat with him. Thanks.

    108. c.paternoster
      29th January 2017, 22:31

      Press 1to make a new clam for job seekers allowance

    109. Nico, hey, wanna hang out and make jokes about Hamilton?

      Dammit! Voicemail!!

    110. “Hey, Alejandro! What’s your series called again? E-Formula 1? Have you got any commercial jobs going?”

      “Social Media manager you say? Sounds dreadful…What’s the pay like?”

      “Well actually, maybe I was being too hasty… Hang on, what’s this? Why are all these people on Twitter claiming to be me? No problem, I’ll just use FOM to ban them all…Oh wait.”

    111. Hello, are you Brian Mills, the man with a certain set of skills? I’m Bernie and I’m about to be Taken…

    112. Flavio, it’s time for Formula Bernie.

    113. “I’m sorry, Mister Jong-Un. I can no longer help in the negotiations for a race in Pyongyang”

    114. Hi, is that Del Boy?

    115. “I’m the Harry Potter’s grandfather”

    116. Eeeeeerrrrrrrhhhhhhh… they gave me the boot!!

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