Caption Competition 125: Bottas and Rosberg

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Valtteri Bottas is ready to pick up where Nico Rosberg left off at Mercedes.

Did the outgoing world champion have any last words of advice for his successor ahead of the start of the new season? That’s for you to decide.

Can you come up with the best caption for this picture? Post your funniest suggestion in the comments below.

A selection of the best will feature in a future edition of the F1 Fanatic Round-up.

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Keith Collantine
Lifelong motor sport fan Keith set up RaceFans in 2005 - when it was originally called F1 Fanatic. Having previously worked as a motoring...

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127 comments on “Caption Competition 125: Bottas and Rosberg”

  1. nelson piquet
    18th March 2017, 11:20

    rosberg: good luck being the number 2 driver

  2. It’s just with all these workouts, the overalls are really tight around your neck.

  3. Rosberg: “Hmm, advice on how to beat Hamilton?…Are you still on good terms with Massa?”

    1. SaturnVF1 (@doublestuffpenguin)
      20th March 2017, 0:05

      Ha!

  4. “Believe me, after this year you’ll want to retire too.”

    1. Very nice!

  5. So Nico, who do I have to talk to to get them to blow his engines up?

    1. Fudge Kobayashi (@)
      18th March 2017, 14:57

      +1

  6. Remember Valtteri, race by race.

  7. Honestly Valterri , I hope Hamilton destroys you.

  8. Rosberg: “No seriously, spend 4 years with Williams, then 6 with Mercedes, then in the 7th year, press up, up, down, down, left, right, square on the steering wheel, and you’ll become champion!”

    1. Michael (@freelittlebirds)
      19th March 2017, 0:10

      @jamiefranklinf1 +1 I know you’re kidding but that’s not far from how Nico gained the 5 points.

  9. “I left no stone unturned in my quest for the title, but perhaps the time I farted in his helmet was too far.”

    1. Um… Interesting.

    2. Hahaha…..I spat out my coffee reading that! :)

  10. ‘Lets just say, if I had seen Force India’s new livery sooner… I would still be in F1’

  11. Rosberg: Don’t worry Valtteri I was average as well prior to Hamilton’s tutelage. Stick around long enough and the team may gift you a title like they did for me last year.

  12. “I’m gonna need your sunglasses too” said Bottas after taking Rosberg’s seat.

    1. The Terminator reference? Lol good one.

  13. Are you still here?

    1. Brilliant.

      +1

  14. Just a few of these fine iron filings in the fuel will do it. Just pick your race so it’s not too obvious.

  15. Bottas – “If you could send me that list of engineers and mechanics… it would be great!”

    1. Michael (@freelittlebirds)
      19th March 2017, 0:12

      +1

  16. Nico, so I take it you found changing diapers harder than you initially thought?

  17. Willie Gaynor
    18th March 2017, 12:00

    Valteri: any tips for me beating Lewis?
    Nico: sleep with nicole scherzinger like I did- completely messed with Lewis’s head ha ha
    Valtari: what’s her phone number?!!

    1. It’s in the Mercedes men’s room 1-800-Village-Bicycle

  18. Bottas: “Hows life after F1?”
    Rosberg: “It’s just constant crying and toys being thrown out of the pram!”
    Bottas: “So no different then?”

    1. Excellent!

    2. Lol, good one!

    3. Oh my! That’s epic!

    4. Brilliant!

    5. And there’s your winner

    6. Michael (@freelittlebirds)
      19th March 2017, 0:12

      +1 ha-ha

    7. Brilliant!

    8. Excellent

    9. Well, the only difference is that my kids will grow up in the future, but Lewis will always be like that …..

    10. Spot on mate!

    11. Ding Ding Ding! We have a winner!

  19. Dark Schneider
    18th March 2017, 12:08

    “Don’t worry.
    I’ll support you from my comfy chair with a beer, while you suffer to hell when you’ll fight harshly with Lewis.”

  20. Rosberg: “If he’s on your outside going into a corner, don’t forget to forget to turn.”

    1. Michael (@freelittlebirds)
      19th March 2017, 0:13

      ha-ha +1

  21. Rosberg: “The shades hide my tears”

  22. “I came from Williams in 2010, you arrived from Williams in 2017, is your money on Massa or Stroll taking your seat for 2018?”

  23. Evil Homer (@)
    18th March 2017, 12:54

    “Why did you quit?”

    “I am Formula One World Champion, job done!”

  24. NR “I thought Red Bull would be faster this year. Can I have my seat back”
    VB “There may be one spare at McLaren soon”

  25. Bottas: You’re not going to come back out of retirement in three years right?

  26. Despite the restraining orders, some ingenious fans have disguised themselves as old retired drivers in an attempt to meet their idols.

  27. Bottas: I aim to emulate Keke Rosberg by winning the world championship for Finland.

    1. ExcitedAbout17
      18th March 2017, 14:33

      Two Finnish furs humid earth Fin ash!

  28. Bottas: Any tips Nico?
    Rosberg: Don’t you mean current world champion Nico?
    Bottas:Erm…..yes… I guess..what do you think of the cars?
    Rosberg: Great…the kind a current world champion could drive….
    Bottas: Hows family life?
    Rosberg: Well…when you are the current world champion….it is just that much better
    Bottas: I’m about to get a bite to eat Nico….want to come?
    Rosberg: Of course, I , Nico Rosberg, current world champion, would love to come.
    Bottas: Great…..
    Rosberg: Did I mention I am the current world champion?

  29. Nico acted a little bit shady when asked how he was able to defeat Lewis.

  30. Nico, please tell Fernando to stop calling me and hanging up…

    1. OmarRoncal - Go Seb!!! (@)
      18th March 2017, 14:02

      Hahahahaa

  31. Nico…”Good luck champ. For God’s sake, don’t let them swap you back to my 2015 mechanics.”

  32. Congratulations Leonardo, I heard you have finally won the Oscar!

  33. Vallteri: Do you think that picture of us the guy to my right is taking will be used for a caption competition?

    Rosberg: Possible. Just in case, let’s act plain boring and give them a really hard time. Oh, and also: Damn Lewis!

  34. OmarRoncal - Go Seb!!! (@)
    18th March 2017, 13:58

    Valtteri Bottass meets a young fan.

    1. Still good.

  35. Bottas: Hey Man how’s it going?
    Rosberg: I’m good

  36. ExcitedAbout17
    18th March 2017, 14:17

    (Rosberg) “Speaking foreign languages in the greenroom will get you under his skin!”

  37. C’mon around the back & I’ll show you where I used to keep the bag of sugar that I’d drop in Lewis’ gas tank every time he got ahead last year…..

  38. Nico: Can you trust Toto and Niki? Think about this: would you buy a used car from either one of them?

  39. Valtteri: “Any tips on how to beat Hamilton?”
    Nico: “Attack from behind and kick him in the groin.”

  40. Nico: “I think mind games are your best chance to win Lewis.”
    Valtteri: “I’d rather just concentrate on driving.”
    Nico: “Yes exactly, I meant his mind games.”

  41. Valtteri Bottas meets an F1 fan.

  42. Nico, why didn’t you tell me I have to walk Roscoe and Coco?

  43. No way I’m a Finn too…

  44. Nico: You can borrow my go cart for practice!
    Bottas: Bwooah!

  45. “Hey Nico, what’s the wifi password?”
    “Oh no, I’m not telling any secrets, I’m neutral”.

  46. “I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle.”

    1. Rosberg: YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID PLEASE!!!!!

      Bottas: NO NO NO!!!! Not the cigar. NOT THE CIGAR!!!!!!!

  47. NR: Did anyone told you that I am the no 1 of the no 2.
    VB😷😷😷

  48. Rosberg: The secret to beating Hamilton is to be more #blessed than he is. Trust me on this one ;)

  49. Bottas: I suppose you heard Lewis and his braking 5 metres closer to the corner on TV? I said to him “Try sloppy gear changes this year and you’ll be second on the podium”.

  50. Hey, so, Nico… maybe you didn’t get the memo, but they retired you. It’s my car now

  51. Bottas: These cars are so different from the old generation. At every corner you feel like you’re going through the spin dryer. “He who never uses the simulator” has had to spend time on it so he can recalibrate his braking and accelerating technique.

  52. Gerulf Dösinger (@)
    18th March 2017, 18:00

    “And then I told Emilia: ‘I’d do the same thing Nico did.’ Speaking of our wives, has yours too started to throw up in the morning recently?”

  53. Bottas: …That was so funny watching him moaning on TV about me stealing his “braking 5 metres later” technique. I told him he’d better not be 4 metres behind me if he does try it because there’ll be Car 44 carbon fibre all over the track.

  54. Bottas: … So I did what you said, I booked up all the best times on the simulator for the entire season. Someone wasn’t very happy and complained to Toto, who said I must have forgotten I was supposed to let him have first choice, but no one has asked me if I’d change my times.

  55. Nico: …keep smiling, we are still on CCTV…

  56. So you’re the idiot who gave up his ride at merecedes. Thanks!

  57. NR: Your number is 77. Lewis’ is 44. 77-44 = 33. 3 + 3 = 6. I’m the champion confirmed.

    1. Looks like you miscalculated your answer there.
      It is 33.3 + 3 = 36.3

      1. NR: Your number is 77. Lewis’ is 44. 77-44 = 33.
        3 + 3 = 6.

  58. VB: Starve myself? Got it. I should be hungrier than Lewis.

  59. “I heard they will be banning finns this year.”

    1. Gerulf Dösinger (@)
      18th March 2017, 19:52

      +1

  60. Rosberg- “When you get to the green room… make sure you throw the cap right at him”

  61. Nico: I always dreamed of being a Dad and Husband!
    Valterri: Now that you are, must be time to quit. you will have so much more time free…

  62. Nico: I have one advise to you Val, what ever you do stay away from Lewis’ hotel room it will save your life.

  63. Hey Nico…how’s Viv and our love child?

    Oh they’re great, thanks for…wait WHAT?

    Err umm…I meant…I too would love a child!

  64. Valliteri: “So, Nico; All I have to do is tell him that i saw some guy chatting up his girl in the paddock?”
    Nico: “yup, worked for me!”

  65. Rosberg: For sure, quit while you’re ahead.

  66. Valtierri: ” So, Nico, all I have to do is say”thanks for the extra 500rpm to the Mercedes engineers while Lewis is in earshot?”
    Nico: ” yup, worked for me!”

  67. So I just put on the harder compound, drove, and was faster than Lewis through testing… easy!

  68. Nico: “Do you think Alonso is jealous?”
    Valtteri: “Of me?”
    Nico: “Of either one of us.”

    1. Ouch!

  69. I can see a real World Champion… reflected in your sunglasses.

  70. Valtteri Bottas chats with an elderly fan during a promotional event at a retirement home.

  71. Jack (@jackisthestig)
    19th March 2017, 1:59

    Valtteri clearly riveted by tales from Nico’s guitar lessons.

  72. Neil (@neilosjames)
    19th March 2017, 4:09

    “… and the best part of winning the championship with Mercedes is that they let you wear sunglasses inside… yeah, even in March. And even when it’s not sunny.”

  73. Repeat my performance Rosberg telling

  74. “Listen carefully, Valtteri, for I am going to disclose to you the single largest and most reliable bargaining chip I used against Lewis – his Snapchat password…..”

  75. Rosberg: “I wouldn’t have driven for Mercedes in 2017, Valtteri, but I’m sure you have your reasons, and I have to respect your decision”

  76. Lewis didn’t kill my F1 career, I did

  77. Bottas, I am your father.

  78. Mirror mirror on the wall, who has the best disguise of them all?

  79. I think I can beat him!
    You’re nuts or will be!

  80. Peppermint-Lemon (@)
    19th March 2017, 11:30

    Nico tells Bottas how to Finnish ahead of Lewis in the championship

  81. So Nico, Mercedes’ confirmed their policy on driver favouritism is the same as last year.

  82. Somewhat sarcastic here.

    VB: What’s the secret to beating Lewis?
    NR: The easy way is to learn to play 3 songs on the piano, play some guitar; own a saxophone (photograph yourself); make someone historically important person your idol (make it known); have tons of image-altering software on your iPhone; hang around friends in cool places; and post everything you do on social media. Get about 500,000 followers on social media and employ 1 each among them to put in the ‘good word’ on your behalf on all major talking areas you’re involved in in the digital world and ask them to defend and rationalize everything you do. Keep it constant. Should some races get compromised, get the planted reps to scream foul, rile the fan-base, and get your team to publicly write an open letter to your fans that they (the team) is not conspiring against you. Play the victim whenever you can and get support pouring in. Oh, and here’s the winner – in the first few races, threaten the team you’ll quit. Remember, you’re a much needed stopgap right now for the team. Use it to your advantage.
    VB: I thought this was motor racing….and, and…you need to be an honest team player…
    NR: I did too. There’s way too much more to it apparently.
    VB: What about speed, consistency, class, performance?
    NR: You’re in a 2-way battle for the WDC. The rest is what you make others believe. Get my point?…….
    VB: I don’t like it.
    NR: Why did you think I retired? There are more meaningful and rewarding ways to live your life than be a team mate to Hamilton and be on the firing side by default. So, if you want to do this, get many fans. Hook up with a branding agent.
    VB: So, I can beat Hamilton that way?
    NR: No. You’ll just negate all off-track pressure he puts your way. You may even put some pressure on him mentally if you do what I say. Ultimately, you’re beating him will depend on your own on-track performance. If you are close enough, the off-track gimmicks will be enough to rattle him. What you’ve got going for you is you’re an unknown to him, which means he can’t say things like you were born into luxury to get support on his side. Don’t talk too much, focus on performance and know the technical side as much as you can.
    VB: Thanks for the heads up.

    1. Write a book

  83. VB : Honestly, he believes this chilly iglo-look of our new motorhome is designed to make him feel sick and favour me, being from Scandinavia and all that. According to Andrew Benson I’m virtually guaranteed to win the WDC ! NB : Well, the mechanic-merry-go-round certainly worked for me !

  84. NR: Don’t worry.. I’m just here for the telemetry.

  85. VB: I thought you’d do a ‘Massa’ and drive for Renault, you know, the yellow team.

  86. VB: So the team made Multi21 map to my Finnish-Grip Hax. On Lewis’s car its Finish-Gripe Hacks!
    NR: (Laughs) He can’t spell…so…
    VB: I know right …

  87. VB – you know what they’re calling you now?
    NR – no. What?
    VB – Nico Cosberg
    NR – What’s cosberg?
    VB – A lettuce….

  88. suryana (@mursidsuryana)
    20th March 2017, 0:53

    “Valterri Bottas is chatting with his fans”

  89. VB: You know what’s frustrating?
    NR: What’s that?
    VB: People seem to have a hard time spelling my firstname. And they don’t eve bother checking it. How hard can it be??
    NR: I know, had a bit of same with my lastname…
    VB: Those F1fanatic readers….

  90. “Malaysia – how’d you arrange that, mate?”

  91. Rosberg: If you decide to make your own cereal? Forget it. Just call Wheaties. You will have an instant face.

    Bottas: What is wrong with Cocoa Pebbles or Fruity Pebbles?

    Rosberg: That is John Cena’s brand. I tried to be the face of the cereal but I was met with “Attitude Adjustment”. Just look at my black eyes.

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