Caroline Cheese, Goddess of the live text on BBC. She did some wonderful stuff in F1 last yeear but has mostly been doing the footie and tennis this year. Some gems of hers:
?1605: It’s so wet at Fratton Park, all 22 players have changed their kit at half-time. What a bunch of girls.
?1900: Hello there. I’m sure you, like me, are itching with anticipation about tomorrow’s goalless draw between Inter Milan and Chelsea at the San Siro. Before that though, a Premier League-Champions League extravaganza. I’m calling it the Prempions League. Or the Champier League. Still working on the title, to be honest.
? ?2016: I think Phil Brown might have hit the sales. He’s got rid of the leather jacket and gone for a long black raincoat and a rather snazzy scarf. Anyway, back to the football. Well, I would get back to the football but there’s not an awful lot happening…
2050: Hull’s tea lady will be called into action as both team…s disappear down the tunnel. Bit of a dull first half. It’s my fault. I made the fatal error of tipping it to be a decent game.
1253: Ted Kravitz’s grid analysis accompanied by the thumping bass of Vanilla Ice. That’s what I will miss most about this season. Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly.
1254: Loving the retro grooves. Some KLF now as we continue the countdown to the last race of the season. I want to meet the BBC’s music person.
1257: Incidentally, music person is probably not his/her job title. Anyway, time to focus, focus, focus…
1300: Twilight qualifying is under way. My tip: Grosjean to go off.
0930: Hello. Formula 1’s great and good will have woken up in the luxurious five-star Yas Hotel. They will have marvelled at the white leather headboards of the beds, designed to resemble the billowing sails of a tall ship. They will have customised their mood lighting and wandered into the all-glass bathroom – with rain shower. They will have breakfasted in one of the nine fine restaurants. But they’ve missed a gloriously drizzly morning in Shepherds Bush. Oh yes.