What would your team be called?
I would buy ART racing team and bring them to F1, combined with my last name. So,
Farr ART. Childish, but it amuses me. Engines from Lamborghini.
Who would your biggest rival be?
Virgin, despite being miles ahead of them, and them not really knowing it. Basically, we’ll have a completely random and unfounded hatred for them, to the extend that we, a team on a tight budget, sponsor their rivals HRT to give that team a boost ahead. We irrationally celebrate every time we beat them- we celebrate every race we complete.
And, of course, Ferrari. Partly because of the Lamborghini engines, but mostly just because it’s Ferrari.
What would be your greatest success story?
Beating (humbling) Ferrari to a debut (first win, first season) win at Monza. This angers the Tifosi due to the old Lamborghini road-car spat, and also because Ferrari begins to lose Italian fans to the British-based team. This cements the relationship with McLaren. This is also the only race all year Ferrari have been able to compete for a podium, let alone a win.
What would be your biggest failure?
Taking out the leader of the final, championship deciding race while being lapped, resulting in a McLaren driver losing the title to someone generally known to be undeserving (despite a penalty, our driver continues, scoring the points to keep Ferrari , who are having a poor season, behind in the constructors, making McLaren a little less pissed).
What would your team be like personality wise (you know how Mclaren are branded as stale but corporate and Ferrari passionate but arrogant…)?
Aloof and pessimistic, at least to the press. We would often do our best to make ‘drunk’ an official personality, particularly mid race when losing badly (drivers included, having a second drink bag and being ordered to use it).
What would your livery be like?
Purple. A deep shade. Needs to be on the grid.
Who would be your main sponsor?
Lamborghini as engine suppliers would feature prominently, even though they need no promotion. Aside from that, bring back Durex, maybe leading to ingenious but distasteful helmet designs forced on the drivers.
Which big F1 name would be your loyal ally?
McLaren. Despite being completely juxtapositioned to their personality (and pace for the most part), they will often bang their heads against the pit wall, but will share resources and celebrate together.
Which big F1 name would be your biggest enemy/rival?
Luca di Montezemelo, Helmund Marko, and Barrichello despite him having left the sport and no longer even commenting on it.
What sort of circuits would your car do well at?
High speed like Monza. As Monza is quite unique, this doesn’t bode well for title contention…
What secret weapon or device would your car have?
8 wheels, skirting the issue of 6 being banned ;)
More realistically, I don’t have a clue.
Which two drivers would you hire and why?
Raikkonen- struggling to find an opening in a top team (due to them having contracts, as he should really be very much in demand) after leaving Lotus.
Senna or some great new British talent.
Eventually Hamilton for a season or two, having had to leave Red Bull in a hurry due to their poor results, as a stepping stone for him to return to McLaren. Only hired on the proviso that he doesn’t have a douche-beard or bling ear ring.
Which reserve driver would you have?
Massa, just so he can’t drive in F1. We will pay him millions to do so, and if a driver becomes injured we’ll just find someone else. To keep the contract valid he’ll be thrown an occasional Friday practice and tea-boy duties.
Which would be your favourite driver really?
Hamilton/Button (despite still driving for McLaren).
@mads love yours
@slr sorry for the coincidental use of Lambo