F1

Write the script for Interlagos

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  • #132405
    Estesark
    Participant

    So, the title’s going down to the wire, and once again it will be settled in Brazil. We could have a dull race, but I’m sure we’re all hoping for a thriller to cap off an entertaining season.

    If there are some unexpected twists, you can bet your life that at least one commentator will say something like “you couldn’t make it up”. Well, this is your chance to make it up :)

    Describe, in as much detail as you like, how next weekend’s Grand Prix will play out. Throw in unpredictable weather, safety cars, crashes, dogs on the track, Frank Williams promoting himself to a race seat, Pedro de la Rosa leading the race thanks to a twenty-car pile-up, whatever you like. Just make it as tense and exciting as possible, and we’ll see if any of our scenarios turn out to be anything like reality :)

    Here’s my effort. Sorry it’s so long – I got carried away!

    Sebastian Vettel dominates all three practice sessions and looks nailed on for pole position. After easily topping the charts in Q1, he decides to make only one run in Q2, in order to save a set of tyres. As he is nearing the end of his out-lap, he gets caught by surprise as Sergio Pérez, who spun and badly flat-spotted his tyres early in his flying lap, makes a slow return to the pits. After they narrowly avoid a collision, Vettel manages to start his flying lap, but has lost time down the first straight and seems shaken. His time is only good enough for tenth, which looks like it might just be enough to get through to Q3, but Felipe Massa is one of the last cars over the line and pulls himself into the top ten, eliminating Vettel.

    In Q3, with Vettel out, the other world champions fight amongst themselves for pole. Lewis Hamilton gets the top spot, with Michael Schumacher putting in a stellar performance to join him on the front row. Mark Webber takes third, while Kimi Räikkönen and Jenson Button take fourth and fifth. Alonso can only manage sixth. Behind him are Romain Grosjean and Pastor Maldonado, giving him cause for concern at the start. Massa is in ninth, which puts him right in front of Vettel, raising the possibility of Ferrari asking him to hold up the reigning world champion in order to help Alonso. Nico Rosberg rounds off the top ten.

    The weather forecast for the race suggests there might be rain within fifteen minutes of the start, but there is no sign of it as the drivers take to the grid, so they all keep dry tyres on. As the race gets underway, Hamilton keeps his lead into the first corner, as Michael Schumacher struggles to hold on to second place. Alonso has one of his trademark starts and is up to fourth after the first corner. At the end of the first lap, it’s Hamilton – Webber – Schumacher – Alonso, with Vettel already up to eighth, having dealt with Massa straight away.

    Alonso soon takes Schumacher for third place, putting him into the podium positions, the minimum he needs to win the title. Ten laps in, Vettel is now seventh and stuck behind Räikkönen; despite having a faster car for most of the lap, he doesn’t have the straight line speed to pass with DRS, and his tyres are beginning to suffer from the dirty air.

    Everyone’s eyes are on the skies, but the rain still hasn’t arrived. The top drivers hold off from making pit stops in the anticipation that it might begin to rain at any moment. And that’s exactly what it does, about twenty laps in. It’s not a heavy shower, but Vettel is one of the first to dive into the pits, happy to exchange his worn-out slicks for some intermediates. Although it’s still pretty dry on his out lap, the rain quickly intensifies and he reaps the rewards as everyone else files into the pits, moving up to third place, directly in front of Alonso. Webber is the next car up the road, but the gap is around ten seconds, so Vettel sets about reeling him, after which Webber yields the position.

    The rain persists, and the situation looks disastrous for Alonso, who can’t get enough heat into his tyres and is losing time to both Red Bulls every lap. But at the half-way point of the race, with the rain still falling steadily and visibility poor, Daniel Ricciardo collides into Jean-Éric Vergne and retires, bringing out the safety car (and the ire of Helmut Marko). Hamilton still leads, but Vettel, Webber and Alonso are now bunched up behind him. The safety car is out for quite a long time, as Ricciardo’s Toro Rosso has to be lifted off the track and many cars have to unlap themselves. In that time, the rain eases off to a light drizzle. At the restart on lap 41, Alonso finds more speed, overtaking Webber and then going after Vettel. Some good defensive driving in the wet from the German prevents Alonso making a pass, however, and the order of the top three remains steady until about lap 50, when the rain stops.

    As a dry line begins to form and Alonso’s time begins to run out, he is the first into the pits for slick tyres, hoping to benefit just as Vettel did earlier. Although his times aren’t anything spectacular, Vettel nevertheless feels he has to react, and comes into the pits on the next lap. A problem with the front-right wheel gun costs him a couple of seconds, though, and as he exits the pits, he is side by side with Alonso. The two of them have an almighty tussle through the infield section of the track, but there’s drama at turn 12 as Alonso, who desperately needs to stay ahead, forces Vettel off the track in order to maintain position. Vettel is immediately on the radio to complain about the move, and the stewards share his opinion, giving Alonso a drive-through penalty. He emerges from it in fourth place, behind Mark Webber again.

    Going into the last ten laps, Hamilton still leads, as he has done the whole race, having just quietly gone about his business regardless of the incidents behind him. Vettel is in second and is being urged by his team to hold the position rather than go for glory, as it would bring him the world championship. Vettel being Vettel, he ignores that advice, and Hamilton finds his lead being challenged for the first time in the race. Vettel, without the straight line speed to make a straightforward pass, gets stuck behind Hamilton for a few laps, but a small mistake from Hamilton with six laps to go allows Vettel to grab the inside line at turn 8 and move into the lead for what would be a remarkable victory.

    It’s not that straightforward for him, however. Hands up, everyone who saw this coming: alternator failure. Vettel loses power with four laps remaining and is forced to pull off the track, throwing his steering wheel out of the car in rage. That promotes Alonso back into third position, enough for him to take the title. Everything seems like it’s falling into Ferrari’s lap, but there’s still a final twist.

    Michael Schumacher, living up to his reputation as the Rainmeister, had looked after his intermediate tyres well in the wet and waited an extra few laps before returning to slicks. Although he lost a place or two in doing so, he soon became the fastest man on the track, and scythed his way through the field into fourth place in what is turning out to be a memorable final race for him. Suddenly everyone notices that he’s gaining on Alonso at around a second a lap, and looks destined to catch him before the chequered flag. The fate of the championship is in his hands – if he manages to overtake Alonso, he will hand the title to Vettel, his German compatriot, but in doing so he will prevent the title from going to Ferrari, the team where he had most of his success. Who will he favour? The answer is nobody, but being the racer that he is, he can’t allow himself to miss the opportunity of passing Alonso. Alonso is relatively helpless, as Mercedes is just too fast in a straight line, making a DRS-assisted pass going into turn 4 on the final lap. Once the pass is done, Alonso throws the kitchen sink at taking it back, but doesn’t have the tyres to do so and crosses the finishing line in fourth place.

    The final result is Hamilton – Webber – Schumacher – Alonso – Räikkönen – Button – Massa – Hülkenberg – Pérez – Maldonado. Vettel takes the championship despite having retired from the race, and all thanks to Michael Schumacher, who bows out with a podium. Hamilton, who is taking his place at Mercedes, leaves McLaren with a second consecutive win. Ferrari miss out once again, also losing third place in the constructors’ championship to McLaren by a single point.

    Phew!

    #215549
    mnmracer
    Participant

    I just stopped breathing for a couple minutes ^_^

    #215550
    Enigma
    Participant

    Very good! I wondered if it’s possible for anyone to write a scenario more thrilling than Interlagos 2008, and I think you managed it!

    #215551
    necrodethmortem
    Participant

    I would rate it a 9; -1 for the championship being decided by a DRS pass :P

    #215552
    HK
    Participant

    Nice story! Just for the sake of asking, does anyone know what the consequenses (penalty) would be if Vettel would deliberatly take out Alonso at the start? … it has happened before, it could happen again, right?

    #215553
    mnmracer
    Participant

    @me4me
    If he does it at the start after being switched to the wrong side of the grid, nothing.
    If he does it on lap 48, exclusion from the championship.

    #215554
    Frain stermin
    Participant

    @Estesark
    Nice try…well written, good thriller….:)
    but i read some things that aren’t logical for this year:
    1)Alonso gets a drive through (he had never get a penalty this year and as i remember the last was Malaysia 2011…nearly two years)
    2) Ferrari problem with tires in wet (in the 3 session of wet this year Malaysia,England,Germany they have got Victory, Pole, Pole)
    3) Schumacher and Mercedes that manages the tyres (even in Ross Brawns dreams) this is two much…
    4) Ferrari that makes two time the bad calls (as a team decisions they have been the best this year thought…that’s why Alonso said we have the best team)
    5) Ferrari lose the WDC and 2nd in WCC… a bad finish for a Ferrari fan (like me)…at least the 2 WCC..:)
    6) Vettel eliminated in Q2 in dry condition (even in my best dreams..:)..)

    But it will be good (for the spectacle) and good for Vettel fans but not Ferrari’s….but who knows.

    #215555
    Enigma
    Participant

    Here’s mine. It’s dry qualifying, with Red Bulls taking the front row ahead of Hamilton and Grosjean, and Alonso in fifth. The race starts in the dry as Red Bulls keep the lead and Alonso gets himself into 4th. But 15 laps in, to the surprise of everyone, it starts raining heavily. Everyone quickly makes a stop for wets and there’s huge drama as Vettel crashes at the pit exit of turn 2 and is out of the race. That promotes Alonso to third, which is just enough for the championship.

    There’s further drama as there’s contact between Kimi, Massa and Grosjean, while Button retires with a car failure. Webber has a 5 seconds lead over Hamilton, with Alonso further 15 seconds behind but having Hulkenberg close behind. The track dries and everyone eventually goes to the slick tyres by lap 50 and they remain more or less in the same order, although Hamilton closes in on Webber. With the track still slightly dry Hulkenberg excells like he did two years ago and passes Alonso, only to have an unlikely car failure with 15 laps remaining, which puts Alonso back in the title winning position.

    Hamilton chases down Webber but fails to get past and looks set to finish 2nd, when all hell breaks loose – it starts raining with a lap and a half remaining and there’s no point pitting. Everyone struggles to keep their car pointing in the right direction and as they enter the final lap of the championship the worst thing for Ferrari happens – Alonso is caught out by the conditions and puts it in the wall at the exit of turn 3.

    But that doesn’t mean it’s over – Bruno Senna, who’s had a fantastic performance in the changing conditions, has got himself into 4th, partly thanks to the retirements of some key players in the race. That means he’s got a great opportunity to end the season with a home podium, but he’s just been lapped by Webber. Red Bull, though, tell Mark to let Senna unlap himself and get ahead of Fernando. Webber obliges, but in doing so gets a challenge from Hamilton – they race hard for the win and surprisingly they keep it on the track, and Hamilton ends his McLaren era with a brilliant win.

    Senna, meanwhile, enters the final lap and passes Alonso’s stricken car, and is told by the team to be extremely careful as he’s guaranteed a podium if he makes it to the chequered flag. But the rain gets so heavy it’s too much of an ask and he loses it at the end of sector two, touching the barrier and damaging his suspension. The title is back in Alonso’s hands.

    But the car seems capable of going, and even though the car is steering right by itself, Senna still tries his best to get it up the hill to the chequred flag. It’s very close in the left-handers, but he just manages it and limps home to take his first podium in F1, and on home soil as well. Ferrari can’t believe they’ve lost the title in the last lap of Interlagos again and Alonso is furious, but it’s Vettel who takes it and becomes a triple world champion at just 25.

    #215556
    Estesark
    Participant

    @fanser You’re right, of course, but I was willing to take small liberties like those in order to create drama, as I didn’t want to say “Glock will be on pole” or anything really ridiculous like that :)

    @enigma Nice story!

    #215557
    Kingshark
    Participant

    Here’s mine.

    QUALIFYING

    Qualifying seems to get underway without drama. The sky is clear blue and not a cloud to be found. Vettel dominated free practice, but by the looks of it on Saturday the Mclaren’s seem to have the pace to take the challenge to the Red Bulls. Lotus and Williams seem to be the dark horses. Mercedes are likely to have good qualifying pace but cannot nail the long runs. Ferrari are nowhere to be found. For the Tifosi and team of Maranello’s best hope will be rain on Sunday.

    No dramas in Q1, the usual suspects being the bottom teams and Vergne are out. Q2 has plenty of action, dramatically, in one of the closest qualifying sessions we have ever seen, Alonso does not make it into the top 10. He looked safe to advance to the next part of qualifying, but a late effort by a retiring Schumacher drops Alonso out of the safety zone with seconds on the clock to spare. It seems any hope for the Spaniard to clinch this seasons championship seems over.

    Meanwhile, Q3 goes by usual proceedings. Vettel sets in a tremendous time of 1:12.123, utterly smashing the rest of the field by half a second, which is a lot for a circuit as short as Interlagos. However, when the least expected, Pastor Maldonado somehow manages yet another banzai late qualifying lap as he did in Spain and Singapore. By a mere .002 seconds, he takes pole positions from Vettel in what is the closest to being his home race on the 2012 calendar. The Venezuelan has shocked the world again.

    The starting grid goes as follows. Maldonado takes pole from Vettel. The two Mclaren drivers share the second row, Lewis besting Jenson in his final race for Mclaren. Webber is fifth and Raikkonen sixth. The two Mercedes drivers, Nico ahead of Michael; Romain Grosjean and Sergio Perez round up the top 10 in that order. Fernando Alonso is only 11th.

    I will write the race script in my proceeding comment.

    #215559
    Kingshark
    Participant

    THE RACE

    Sunday looks not nearly as bright and sunshiny as Saturday. A dark, gloomy cloud has blocked the sun rays from shining on São Paulo. The weather forecast predicts nothing less than a rainfall within 15 to 25 minutes within the race. The air temperature is a chilly 18 degrees, the track temperature 23.

    Going into the race, let us all remind ourselves that Pastor Maldonado is on pole position, edging out Sebastian Vettel in qualifying, who looks strong to take his third consecutive crown. The Mclaren’s share the second row ahead of Mark Webber. The Ferrari’s only managed 11th and 13th in qualifying after struggling horrendously with one lap pace. Seemingly, it will take a miracle for Fernando Alonso to win the championship from this position.

    On the formation lap, the fact that the Lotus struggles to heat up its tyres quickly becomes quite obvious. Romain Grosjean embarrassingly spins when trying to hard on getting his rear tyres up to temperatures. When attempting to spin his car back into pointing in the correct way, he nearly takes a piece off Alonso’s front wing. Controversially, he is permitted to rejoin his previous starting position 9th. This has once again, in a rather fearful way reminded the Ferrari driver to be cautious around inexperienced youngsters.

    The start; 5 lights out and away we go! Predictably, Sebastian Vettel takes a cautious approach in turn 1. Despite getting off the line a tad better than Pastor Maldonado, an aggressive chop by the Venezuelan immediately forces the German to lift off the throttle in the run to the Senna S. This allows Lewis Hamilton to pass him and up into second place. Meantime, behind Fernando Alonso has already disposed of Hulkenburg and Grosjean, and sets off after the Mercedes’.

    Simultaneously, disaster strikes Kimi Raikkonen! Subsequently, making only the slightest bit of contact with Mark Webber’s front wing ensuing going two wide into the turn 4, it damaged his right rear tyre enough to cause a puncture. He is forced back into the pits and change tyres. This unfortunate stint has caused him to fall behind almost an entire lap behind the leaders.

    Unsurprisingly, it has been the song all year that even when showing promise in qualifying, the WO3 is just not build for Sundays. By lap 2, even before the DRS is enabled Alonso already has taken care of both Rosberg and Schumacher, whose last race of his career is, by the looks of things, going to be quite a bit less memorable than his first retirement six years ago. It becomes quite painful to watch for not only Schumacher fans, but Formula 1 fans in general as the legend and 7-times world champion struggles to keep his severely unbalanced Mercedes pointing in the right direction. Both him and Rosberg and being swamped by the midfield pack.

    Up at front everything is generic thus far. Maldonado leads Hamilton by only 2 seconds. Lewis has kept the Williams in his sight and would love nothing less than a final victory to celebrate his last race for Mclaren. Vettel is a further 5 seconds behind the pair. Jenson Button, in fourth, is in a massive wheel to wheel tussle with Mark Webber. The two men switch position several times. Webber lunges an attack on Button out of nowhere into the Senna S. However, Jenson plays it smart and with his superior top speed and DRS, repasses Mark back on the run down to turn 4. Fernando Alonso, who is currently sitting behind this pair, is progressively becoming more frustrated as he is losing touch with Vettel, but concurrently cannot afford to take any risks, especially not with Webber.

    Unalike Monaco, for once the weather forecast has not fooled us with constant fake threats. On lap 11, the first drips of rain hit the camera lens and are viewable from the F1 fans perspective. At first, the threat of rain seems rather minor, but after a few minutes, the rain is starting to get heavier. The lap times done by the leaders have dropped by several seconds, cars are sliding all over the place. Webber out-brakes himself on the way into Juncao and spins, barely keeping it out of the wall, but he has lost places to Alonso and Grosjean.

    Clearly, slick tyres are no longer the ones to be on. On lap 15, Williams and Mclaren flinch first, calling in Maldonado ahead of Hamilton. However, thanks to the Mclaren crew and their “you blink and you miss it” quick pit stops, manage to get Lewis ahead of Maldonado. Alonso and Vettel pit on the same lap, Vettel preceding ahead of Alonso. Button opted to stay out for another lap, but unlike many of his other strategic decisions that proved to be the wrong one for him. Even in a time frame as quickly as his outlap, the conditions worsen and the rain gets even heavier. Jenson loses some 20 seconds on that outlap and finds himself in the midfield pack once pitted.

    Now, on lap 17 as the race proceeds, Lewis Hamilton leads 2.3 second ahead of Pastor Maldonado. Sebastian Vettel is a further 2.1 seconds behind, Fernando Alonso is found trailing the race leader by some 10 seconds. The rest of the midfield pack, including Grosjean, Webber and Button are trailing the leaders by over 25 seconds now. Kimi Raikkonen, whose pace has been tremendous despite his puncture on lap 1 is now quickly catching the midfield tussle. The wheel to wheel action going on between the Sauber’s, Toro Rosso’s, Force India’s, Mercedes’, Lotus’; Senna, Webber and Button is very entertaining and action-pack. On lap 20, these 13 cars are separated by only a mere 11 seconds.

    Apparently, it becomes obvious that the low downforce and top speed favoring car setup on Williams of Pastor Maldonado was not meant for these treacherous conditions. He is visually struggling with the back end of that FW34. Vettel slips past the pole sitter on the run into the Senna S, and Alonso makes an identical move 2 laps later. They are now second and third respectively, Hamilton still leads this race though.

    Casually, the Williams falls back from the front runners and joins the colossal midfield battle. Maldonado’s aggressive approach in the early days of the rain only seem to have gotten the worst of him, as he is now losing grip in his rear tyres. Eventually, Williams have no choice but to pit both cars again for fresh tyres; as both Senna and Maldonado have destroyed their current set. This leaves them at the back of a train of cars. The pole sitter, despite being strong in qualifying and the dry, is fading away in the race trim and that Williams is obviously not setup for conditions like these, but rather for the dry.

    The gap between Vettel and Hamilton is only a few seconds, and their sector times are virtually identical. However, Alonso, who was struggling to get heat into the tyres early on during the rain, at last has heated his intermediates up to temperatures. Alonso’s pace is a class of the field, as he closes up to the back of Vettel; while Vettel knows that there is no real need to fight Alonso, but making Fernando’s life more difficult and not easily giving up the place will only be beneficial for him. Several laps go by, time after time Alonso has a look on the inside of the Red Bull but thinks again. On lap 32 however, this was not the case. Alonso, who had a great exit out of Juncao pulled his nose alongside the RB8 and made the crucial pass, with him being as late on the brakes as one can get. Alonso is now up to second place, Hamilton still leads with Vettel on the final spot of the podium though, so by the looks of things, the championship is still Vettel’s to lose.

    Readily the track dries up. There is now a clear dry racing line visible on the tarmac. FIA make the accommodation to enable the Drag Reduction System. The DRS zone appears quite risky, as the wing itself may open even before Curva da Sol is complete. Despite the zone being identical to last years, this caused some controversy before the race whether if such a risky DRS zone should enable the drivers to use this tool even when the circuit is moist.

    Unfortunately for Vettel, his radio has not been working this race. Instead, he has been forced to communicate with his team via the pit board.

    Nonetheless, with his rear tyres completely destroyed and no grip left in them whatsoever, on lap 39 Michael Schumacher is the first to pit for slicks, happily willing to exchange his grained intermediates for brand new primes. Despite Michael’s pace being very good early on the wet stint, steadily his lap times dropped as the Mercedes was eating those rear tyres faster than a fat man eating burgers. The front runners keep a keen eye on Schumacher’s sector times. After going purple in the final sector of his outlap; eyebrows raise immediately among the top teams.

    Hamilton’s tyres have been torn to shreds. Alonso’s last lap was a full 2 seconds faster than Lewis’s. Fernando’s last chance to overtake Lewis one lap before they will switch the tyres to slicks again. On the run down to Juncao, Alonso makes a brave dive down the inside of the Mclaren driver. Hamilton attempts to take a wide line and lots of kerb on the exit, to try and to the cutback, but his tyres are wrecked and he does not have the traction to do so.

    All three men, line astern, enter the Interlagos pit lane for likely the last time of the season. While Alonso and Hamilton were tussling, Vettel managed to close the gap to the leaders completely and is now right behind them.

    Catastrophically, it has all gone wrong for Red Bull in the pits. When Vettel pits, his left rear wheel did not go on properly. The lollipop man released Vettel from his pit box before the rear mechanic could react. Unaware of his loose left rear tyre, and his radio communication being cut, Vettel drives a shabby Red Bull with only three wheels actually being attached to the car itself out of the pitlane. An unscrewed RB8 exits the pitlane, and before Vettel can react, on the exit of Curva de Sol his wheel pops off and his car collides with the wall.

    However, for Ferrari all things did not go to plan either. After Alonso passed Hamilton only a corner before the pitlane, Lewis managed to retake the position around the outside of turn 4 when exiting the longest pitlane on the F1 calendar. Hence, Alonso is now back down to second place again. Nonetheless, there are nothing less but temporary short-term celebrations in the Ferrari. Now their man lies second, and only needs 14 points or more to become champion, in other words, a third place.

    After the crash, Sebastian himself and his health are fine, but nothing but bitter disappointment haunts the Red Bull garage as they have thrown away a seemingly easy championship. However, if there is one positive thing coming out of this for Red Bull, is that Vettel’s crash has caused a Safety Car. This has made the Ferrari garage somewhat nervous. Mark Webber, who was a distant third before this incident, will now be right behind Alonso. In fourth place, benefiting from the early pitstop for slicks, is Michael Schumacher.

    To be continued…

    #215560
    Prisoner Monkeys
    Participant

    I’m just going to do a short version:

    A torrential downpour in qualifying scrambles the running order, leaving Alonso up the front and forcing Vettel to make up considerable ground. The race ends with Alonso winning and Vettel fifth, handing the championship to Alonso. However, the Williams cars fail scrutineering and Maldonado – who had finished fourth – is disqualified, promoting Vettel to champion in Alonso’s place.

    But it is not over yet: one month after the race, a whistleblower steps forward with extraordinary claims – that the race was rigged in Red Bull’s favour. In the lead-up to the race, Renault had supplied all of their teams with a new specification of alternator. What they didn’t say was that there were actually two versions of the alternator supplied. One, installed in the Red Bull cars, fit the rules; the other, which was placed in Maldonado’s car – as well as Raikkonen’s and Grosjean’s – was in violation of them, and modified in a way to make them appear legal.

    The FIA are never able to prove exactly what happened, but the suspicion is that Williams and Lotus were given dummy parts as a failsafe to ensure Vettel’s third title. In the event that Alonso beat Vettel, an anonymous tip would point the stewards in the direction of the offending parts of any car that finsihed between Alonso and Vettel. Such illegal parts would see the disqualification of these cars, thereby promoting Vettel to the point where he scored enough points to be champion.

    These revelations send shockwaves through the motorsport community (similar to the time Toyota cheated in the WRC by installing turbos with a variable restrictor that could be changed without breaking the seal that was supposed to prevent this). Red Bull strenuously deny any connection to the scandal, and the FIA are unable to prove it – and without proof, they cannot reinstate Maldonado in the standings. Instead, given the controversial nature of the championship outcome, they take the extraordinary step of declaring that there is no drivers’ champion in 2012.

    #215561
    mnmracer
    Participant

    @kingshark
    Cheeky ;-)

    #215562
    Estesark
    Participant

    @prisoner-monkeys That’s drama of an altogether different kind. Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that!

    #215563
    Prisoner Monkeys
    Participant

    @estesark – My other idea was going to be an all-out war between the teams over who was going to be champion, with a third of the grid siding with Alonso, a third of the grid siding with Vettel, and the other third trying to take advantage of the situation. It would have ended with Alonso as champion, Red Bull trying to get everyone banned so that Vettel could be champion, Schumacher on the podium, Sauber out-scoring Mercedes in the WCC, every driver I don’t like – Vettel, Raikkonen, di Resta and Senna – being caught up in a first-lap fracas that would go down as one of the most legendary accidents of all time, and Helmut Marko ording the Toro Rossos to make life hell for Alonso by doing whatever it meant to stop him from being champion even if it meant intentionally crashing into him (and subsequently getting banned for life a la Briatore for it).

    But that would have taken forever to write up and I don’t have the time.

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